YOU MIGHT BE A RACER IF ...
* You think the primary purpose of wings is to PREVENT flight.
* You are happiest when your street car's tires are worn to racing depth and the wear bars are showing.
* Your email address refers to your race car rather than to you.
* You've paid $10.00 a gallon for gas without complaining.
* You bought a race car before buying a house.
* You bought a race car before buying furniture for the new house.
* You're looking for a tow vehicle and still haven't bought furniture!
* The requirements you give your real estate agent are (in order of importance):
1) 8 car climate controlled garage with an attached shop.
2) Outside parking for 6 cars, a motor home, a crew cab dually, a 28' enclosed trailer and a 34' 5th wheel.
3) 3 phase 220V outlets in the garage for your welder.
4) A grease pit.
5) Deaf neighbors.
6) Some sort of house with a working toilet & shower on the property - or - hookups for the motor home.
* You sit in your race car in a dark garage and make car noises and shift and practice your heel and toe, while waiting for your motor to get back from the machine shop.
* You have enough spare parts to build another car.
* More than one racer supply store recognizes your voice and greets you by name when you call.
* You've tried to convince your wife you needed that flow bench to fix the air filter on her station wagon.
* You save broken car parts as "momentous".
* You've found your lawnmower runs pretty good on 110 octane gas but doesn't particularly care for alcohol.
* The local police and state highway patrol have a picture of your car taped to their dashboard.
* Instead of pictures in your wallet, you have time slips.
* After you tell your wife where you'd like to go on vacation she answers: "Why...is there a race track there?"
* You know at least three 1-800 numbers to aftermarket parts houses by heart.
* You are on a first-name basis with owners of every local speed shop.
* You own a vehicle that has at least 500 horsepower more than when it came out of Detroit.
* You look for hi-performance cars in movies and try to guess what engine size, tire size, and whether or not it has nitrous.
* You are the type of person who goes nuts when you have to sit in a traffic jam for more than five minutes, yet you can spend five hours in the staging lanes.
* Every stoplight becomes a practice tree to test your ability to tree the guy in the other lane.
* You wash your car like it was your firstborn child, you tend to its needs like it was your own body, you protect it like it's your family, then you take it to the track and drive it like you stole it.
* You understand racing is a way of life, not just a means of transportation.
